Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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