And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
