I'm gonna have a badass scar
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
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