my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize