doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
