i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
