end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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