Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
