i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
