i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
