Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
