just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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