Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Terrible idea I love it
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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