Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
