Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize