whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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