It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize