I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Life is so much better after having sex.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
we should paint friendship bongs
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
