You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
