smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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