I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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