He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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