With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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