i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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