Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
