Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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