East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Randomize
