dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
