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• (917): View more from New York City

  Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.

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• (716): View more from New York

  If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (720): View more from Colorado

  I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.

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• (903): View more from Texas

  True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (714): View more from California

  Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.

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• (253): View more from Washington

  It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.

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