Texts From Last Night

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  (912): View more from Georgia

  That's intense

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  (912) That's intense http://tfl.nu/r7sa
  Replies (18) Good night (923) Bad night (853)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!

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  (502): WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?! http://tfl.nu/ajcv
  Replies (16) Good night (1227) Bad night (4754)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling

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  (208): opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling http://tfl.nu/a6db
  Replies (11) Good night (6195) Bad night (607)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.

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  (506): He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants. http://tfl.nu/uu5r
  Replies (16) Good night (5065) Bad night (960)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?

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  (713): Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order? http://tfl.nu/nfxj
  Replies (2) Good night (2778) Bad night (960)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.

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  (407): I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila. http://tfl.nu/7js5
  Replies (9) Good night (2979) Bad night (1005)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.

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  (214): Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks. http://tfl.nu/p4l3
  Replies (6) Good night (3132) Bad night (1543)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.

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  (917): You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door. http://tfl.nu/b3vl
  Replies (8) Good night (2312) Bad night (1104)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.

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  (770): the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY. http://tfl.nu/d6x2
  Replies (6) Good night (1335) Bad night (536)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.

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  (352): She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later. http://tfl.nu/9nzg
  Replies (1) Good night (1275) Bad night (717)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I will give you all my nachos to make this happen

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  (480): I will give you all my nachos to make this happen http://tfl.nu/ghnu
  Replies (4) Good night (1182) Bad night (506)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole

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  (617): Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole http://tfl.nu/3dil
  Replies (7) Good night (2493) Bad night (350)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time

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  (434): I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time http://tfl.nu/ligv
  Replies (7) Good night (315) Bad night (948)
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  (408): View more from California

  My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine

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  (408): My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine http://tfl.nu/4len
  Replies (5) Good night (262) Bad night (469)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening

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  (501): When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening http://tfl.nu/gsvb
  Replies (1) Good night (290) Bad night (422)

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