apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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