Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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