He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I've blown a few things in my day
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
