is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize