Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
