You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
COCAINE IS GR8
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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