Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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