I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
