it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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