Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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