He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
