Do you still have your period?
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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