Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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