Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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