When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
