I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
