ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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