there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
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i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
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Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
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