singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I'm in love with you.
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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