they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
