And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
