She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
